Struggles to understand identity and power

I think Gutteriez talks about what is ultimately important in education- pursuing excellence where as Lubienski speaks about what is pragmatic in terms of making changes.

I found Gutteriez four elements:

-access

-achievement

-identity and

-power

helpful expand my thinking about equity, but I feel my understanding of the latter two still foggy. For years as a teacher I have focussed on access to meaningful mathematics and promoting high achievement. I would even add “Awareness” to this list, helping students see the value of marks and the conventions of schooling and middle class.

As for identity and power- a bit of background may help to put my comments in context. I am from Northern BC- 1 hour from the Alaskan Panhandle. I realise now that we were statistically poor, but so was the rest of the community so we didn’t know it (one we only had 1 TV channel). Almost everyone I knew was self-employed or worked small family companies in logging or ranching. Independence was a very prized commodity, as was community; strategic behaviours to get promoted or noticed was completely absent.

Since I have lived all over Canada and in Europe a couple of times and my understanding of power and identity have been challenged. For years I just wanted to move “home” because I had a community there. It is only in recent years, that I realised that a lot of this was a struggle for identity, the communities I live in now have different norms and I not really sure I know how to fit into them.

I almost didn’t go to university because no one I knew did but a guidance counsellor put a lot of pressure on me and my sister to go because we were strong students. I loved it my sister didn’t like the environment and dropped out after a year. No one in the family questioned her decision- “Do what you want to do” (Just an aside in terms of equity- She has way more work experience than I do, yet I make double her salary). My parents were proud of me for completing a BA and MA, but openly questioned the value of a PhD.

When I first became aware of “power” in a course for my Bed, I was very uncomfortable with openly teaching about it. It seemed to me that the activities I saw would build resentment among the less powerful and I didn’t see the value in that. As a teacher, I did what I thought was best for my students, and this was informed by my experiences in a community that didn’t value schooling. I acted as the schools IT coordinator, and initially I had a lot of influence on decisions being made in the school, but with a change in administration, I become voiceless in the school and resentful of the fact. Starting my MA, was a result of this. I can now see some ways that other teachers behave to have a voice in school decisions in the school, but I as try out new behaviours, I think sometimes I come on too strong and may come of abrasive. I also struggle with who I want to be- brown-nosers were really looked down upon in my world. How to act proactively yet maintain some sense of identity?

It is this recent awareness of education politics that makes me appreciate Lubienski’s argument. Test results are important to policy makers. And we need these people to invest in education.

These reflections developed in my forties with a lot of education, and I consider my culture to be fairly close to mainstream (maybe I am wrong about that). How do we help students of other races and cultures feel they can participate effectively in the mainstream and yet maintain their identity? How do we raise these issues in the classroom without alienating students that feel as I once did?